Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Ok I have been feeling this rant coming along for a long while now and have been holding it in.  So if you don't want to hear my odd little opinion now it the time to tune out.
So politically I find myself leaning toward republican candidates.  There are however a few backward notions in all parties.  We as a nation need to stand up and say we support certain ideas and rights, without them becoming political soapboxes.
I support a woman's right to choose.  I do not ever believe that I could do it myself, but who is to say I will not be raped by someone one day and feel very differently.  Maybe even medical condition that causes a choice between life and death of one.  I also believe that if that embryo is going to become a child that is going to have an awful life with a mother that doesn't want it, why not give the mother the option to make her own decisions without killing herself.  This decision has been made in the past and should stand as it is.
I believe in gay rights and gay marriage.  If you don't try to put yourself in their purgatory.  You love someone, you are with them, you live with them, you cannot get married, you can have children, but one parent only has the rights to that child that you can provide to any stranger on the street by paperwork.  This is not a way for anyone to live.  This should not be a political stance this should be a basic human right to love who you choose.  Not to mention in America you should be given the same basic rights and opportunities as anyone else.  I do not want my fellow Americans that may stand with me otherwise politically to have to choose a democrat simply because they support gay marriage.
We need to tell the politicians to stop standing on these old fashioned issues and stand for the american people.  They need to stand for the military, the economy, education, and foreign relations.  This is what I want for my president, so Mr. Obama you have some work to do.  Stop creating programs that leech debt without any returns.  I do not want to be in debt myself and am working my way out.  You, the house, and congress need to work America out of the deep hole we are digging.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Fastest Rejection Ever

I have been in HI for a couple of months now and looking for a job.  I am attempting to be more particular than I have been in the past.  I want a job that I want to have.  I applied for a position at one of the hospitals in the area two days ago, I received the rejection overnight.  I applied in the afternoon, so maybe if I applied in the morning I would have been rejected the same day.  Less than 24 hours to tell me that I am not suited for the job, although the only requirement is a high school education and a little clerical experience in the field (that I have).  I understand that there are many applications to go through, but human resources needs to realize that there are people on the other end of the big fat NO they deliver.  Gotta love being a military spouse!!!  Trying to get a job in a field that you love, while holding down another random job makes your resume look unreliable.  The people hiring have bills to pay don't they???  Yes I have a varied work history, but if you moved to parts of the country where there were few jobs you would have a varied work history too.  Just saying it sucks to be a spouse some days!  By the time I find a job I love we will be moving again.  Hopefully you are Semper Paratus for rejection too.  When someone finally decides to hire or at least interview me that is what will catch me off guard, but I look forward to it.  Semper Paratus for tomorrow.

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Move sans puppy so far

We are here in Hawaii.  My hubby was MIA before we moved into our house.  So I have had to deal with all of the baloney of the movers and unpacking alone.  People say that it is more difficult with children, I am very sure that it is.  I am glad that this comment no longer bothers me as much as it used to, people are in their own bubbles and who am I to pop it and tell them that I would love to have a child.
I almost have everything unpacked, at least I get to decide where everything goes.
Now to get into the difficulty of attempting to get my dog here.  First before leaving we had to get the dogs blood drawn and tested for rabies I guess, because this is a rabies free state.  After that you can wait 120 days and your dog can be released at the airport.  My dogs 120 was up on the 7th.  She has been staying with my parents.  You have to have certain paperwork turned into the quarantine facility and then the dog is not allowed to come into the state for 10 days.  They are very particular about the paperwork.  I had to go twice.  I finally turned it in Friday once receiving a new rabies certificate from the vet.  It has to be original paperwork with a signature from the vet, not a stamp.  I have to call on Tues to make sure that everything is good.  After that I have to get my parents to take my dog to the vet again and schedule the flight.  The vets visit has to be within 14 days of the flight.
My 7 year old puppy has to cross the country and pacific ocean with no potty breaks :(.  I hope that I can get her into the quickest flight as possible.  When she gets here and I pick her up, I am not allowed to take her out of her crate.  My dog is 50 plus pounds and the crate is giant, you are supposed to place it all in one piece into a vehicle.  I have a car and the crate doesn't fit through the door.  I do have a friend that said she will take me, so hopefully she will be available that day.  I hope that they change some of the stuff around here and the long flights for animals, I am quite amazed that there is not a group that has jumped on this and demanded more for our pets.  I guess they don't care, because they think that people who are sending their pets are flying with them and not moving.
BTW if you are moving the military only repays you for the $165 direct release fee, it costs more than that to get puppy here.  Vet visit costs and flight cost are much more than the $165.  God help you if you have more than one animal.  Why don't people look at animals as part of someone's family?  Would you leave your kid behind if they didn't pay to move them?  I understand that if they cover 1 they would have to cover 30 etc, but why not just put animal limits.
If you have a pitbull, rotweiller, etc good luck finding a home on or off base.  Now that the housing is privatized they deny certain breeds of dogs.  This really gets under my skin.  Housing should be your safe haven, like if you cannot find a place at least you have a place there or the opportunity (waiting lists aside).  BTW not accepting animals is not a reason to reject a home according to the TLA.  Not that I personally would buy a pitbull, but what if you got one as a puppy living in your personal home and had to move you would be screwed.  This encourages pet abandonment.  If you have had the animal for any length of time it is most likely out of the cute puppy stage and could very likely be put to death before adoption if you don't research the facility well.
Been a long time needed to get that rant out!!!  I hope that this helps you be a little more semper paratus than me if you are coming to HI.
Until next time, Semper Paratus.

Friday, April 27, 2012

Here we go...

My hubby and I have been living apart for a WHILE now.  He has been geo-bachelor in FL and I have been working in SC.  He has been able to come and see me numerous times, and we have made it work.  Including fertility treatments, AHH!  Maybe I'll update that a little later.
We are moving to HI.  I only have three more shifts of work left and then goodbye job.  I am going to attempt to visit family next week and live with my husband for about a month before we leave.  Getting used to living with him again should be interesting.
I have a serious nervousness of the unknown, and lack of planning.  I am attempting to plan the things that cannot be planned right now, like where to live.  I know that I will not be able to find a place without seeing it, but that doesn't stop me from researching every rental property site known to man.
We are also attempting to downsize and sell our boat and my husband's car, not to mention rent out our house. We already have a property manager that told us we had someone lined up, but failed to have them sign a contract a month ago.  So no money for a rental.  No one can get financed for our boat or car.  Gotta love it!!!
I know that all of this will find a way to settle out, but being in limbo SUCKS.
Good luck to anyone else out there in limbo land.  Gotta love the unknown.  Semper Paratus :).

Friday, February 4, 2011

Update

I am so lucky my husband got to come back and see me and we went to Jamaica.  We had a wonderful vacation and got to spend some beautiful, but oh so short moments together.  Before I knew it he was gone again.  I was so spoiled the first half of his tour, his boat was in dry dock most of the time.  His boat seems to always be gone this half.  I get random phone calls at the most inopportune times.  I am back to crying the few times I get to see him on skype now.  I am also finding some things are making me emotional again, but it is much better than before.
I now worry about connecting with my husband when he returns.  We are probably going to have him go Geo Bachelor to his next station, so I can establish my career a little more.  I know sacrifices have to be made for our future, but I cannot help but wonder and worry a bit.
I have a job and have been desperately trying to adjust to the 24 hour schedule.  Some days it is great others it sucks up all the days around it.  My sleep schedule is all screwed up!!!  I want to sleep the day after my shift and  get to bed early the day before my shift.  I have to just commit and schedule my sleep times.
I hope everyone out there is doing well.  Stay strong!!!
Semper Paratus!!!

Thursday, October 7, 2010

THE SWITCH

We all have one and different things trigger it for each of us.  You know what I am talking about the "light" switch that turns caring loving people into infuriated explosions of rage.  Now I don't hit or anything like that, but don't mess with me after you flipped it.
Today I had my trigger flipped by "family" on facebook.  This person posted on the page "MISS YOU" over and over.  That just makes my blood boil.  Really you miss you husband so much that you have to state it multiple times even though he is a stones throw away.  I had to hold back extensively not to post something really mean on the post.  I just put "REALLY???".  To which was replied with troubles with baby and school.  She didn't realize, but that didn't make me feel any better actually made it a little worse.  I don't have a child and haven't been able to get pregnant, so any trouble she has with that does not make me pity her in the least.  She doesn't know what I would give to be up late with a child.  It took everything I had not to post something else, much harsher.
Now if she had just put once that she missed and loved her husband that would be one thing, but to excessively inundate me with that is irritating.  This goes for people with children or women who are pregnant, take your time post once a day (unless something bad happens, that is different).  In one day I don't need to know baby names, the color of the room, photos of the ultrasound, or about your feet swelling.  For the parents I love most baby pics, but come on plus most of the pics are bad... baby up, baby down, baby messy, baby on four wheeler (at least take the out of focus ones off).  That one post a day thing is for you too new parents, I don't want to view 80 phone photos of your baby throughout the day.  There are plenty of photo resources out there that can connect you and the grands with every photo that only they and you want to see (pick an choose a few for the rest of us).
Alright those are not the really full switch flippers, but hope that you never find out.  Take care and try to hold your switch down, so people don't get hurt :).  Semper Paratus.

Monday, September 20, 2010

awful!!!

http://www.wtkr.com/news/wtkr-vb-navy-wife-death,0,2300697.story
I don't know any details, but this is just terrible!!!!  I hope we all keep thoughts with the family!
I have been hearing about many different things about women being taken advantage of and hurt or killed.  This, the acid in the face etc.  Everyone needs to remember to keep their guards and heads up!!!
At home I am definitely comfortable with my great neighbor, growling shepherd rottie mix, and gun.  BTW if your my friend call first or you might get shot.
When I am out in town I am constantly looking around, esp when gassing up at night (only when a requirement).  I look around for weapons for me to use, keys, pens, pepper spray, glass, bats, bottles, belts.  Look around you how many weapons do you have near???  I don't look at these things to put the person down, but to shock for a run to safety.  I also keep my car in drive and cranked when possible like at ATMs and drive-thrus (be careful keep foot on brake).  You can easily use your car as a weapon!!!
Here are some of my other tips...
  Keep your doors locked
  Keep your eyes opened EVERYWHERE!!!
  Don't tie a yellow ribbon or put the flag in your window, unless maybe living on base (I still wouldn't).
  Listen to what people are saying around you!!!  (it is surprising what the crazy white girl look can do for you, you know the one "I will shoot your ass" or "I will blow up your house look" got me through years living in the ghetto)  (most robbers etc want an easy target)
  Do the same your husband should, take different routes home and back, don't be predictable.
  Don't tell people you don't know your husband is gone, I am guilty of this one esp when I am sad telling the cashier or something DON'T DO IT (I won't anymore either)
  Watch out for people just standing around (esp with cups, they will compliment you then throw acid in your face)
  Take a self defense class (next up for me)
  Ladies night at the Gun Range (call ahead (reputable place), usually they will have ammo and guns to use, and designated instructor)
  Do all of you errands in the DAYTIME!!! (this was hard for me I am a night owl)
  Know the area .

OK, sorry guys I had to go there!!!  Let me know if you have any tips for me!!!  Semper Paratus!!!

Friday, September 17, 2010

I have a job as an EMT!!!!!

I got the call last week about working for one of the counties in the area as an EMT Basic!!!!  I of course accepted.  I was so convinced that I didn't make it my husband and I were looking at places to relocate very far away.  Now that I have a job, it is time to look closer to home.
When I got the call I am sure that the man on the phone could hear my excitement, when I said yes, jumped a little, and almost screamed.  I finally have that feeling of self worth again that no one could repair.  All of the rejections, all of the places that didn't even call or email to reject me (made me feel like I was not even worth the mass rejection email).  When I hung up with one of my new bosses I couldn't help it I jumped up and down and screamed like a child.  Then all of that rejection turned into tears of joy and a feeling I cannot explain.
Now to keep the job and tell the about the week long trip to Jamaica the second month I am working.  They shouldn't have a problem with it, I hope considering I at the time will have been without my husband for 7 months.
I am definitely nervous about starting this job!!!  Let me be ready for anything!!!  Semper Paratus!!!

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

the makings of deep dark depression

This is what has been going on with me lately.  I haven't been able to sleep, but when I do it is for 12+ hours.  Tonight I thought I would get to bed early, but finally headed to bed about 12 or so.  Something happened to me when I tried to sleep, some switch went off.  I started thinking about my beautiful husband being gone, but not just gone away, the forever kind.
I thought about the men at would arrive at my doorstep and if they consider what time to go to families.  I concluded that their visit would be mid-afternoon or later.  I can't see their faces, but can see their neatly pressed uniforms.  I see myself peeking out of the window and running to them to hit them before they reach my door.  I see myself pounding on their chests screaming to see my husband.  I visualize myself unable to move wallowing in the grass, tears, and dirt.  I can see my husbands face, but the rest of him is barely there.
I can consider the thoughts that would ramble around in my mind.  Should I just end it all?  I don't have him or any children that will grow up to be as wonderful a person as he, what is the point.  Should I post on facebook to let distant friends know?  How will I survive, I don't have a job?  Can I live without him, do I want to?
Will I call the people I know with the VFW to ensure he has all the services he deserves?  Will his family even look at me, or will I just remind them of who is not around?
I am sorry if I may be going off the deep end tonight, but I have to get this out while I can.  I don't want to think about this anymore and thought getting it out will help me cope some.  Thanks for reading.  Hopefully none of us have to be Semper Paratus for this.  If you have any thoughts like these feel free to get them out here.  Huge hugs and hopefully no crocodile tears for you.

Monday, August 30, 2010

FlyLady

I LOVE FlyLady!!!  For those of you who do not know what Flylady is you need to check it out, unless you are a super organized neat freak (like my mother in law***I LOVE YOU KAREN!!!) .
I am not a naturally neat organized person at all!  When I was a kid they joked (to mask their disapproval)  that I  had to swim through my toys to get to bed.  As a teen my bed was always covered with clothes.  At the Citadel the outward appearance of everything was neat and clean, but open up my giant laundry bags and hiding places and you found my mess.  As an adult I would stuff closets, cabinets, and be in a mad dash to clean when we were having company over.  My house now is finally to the point of a quick 15 minutes and it is clean for company, thanks to FlyLady.
When I started the program I went in full force and followed every rule and program.  Now I only use most of the things as suggestions.
The best and worst of it starts when you start getting rid of things.  I am constantly looking at things twice before I buy them.  I ask myself "Do I really NEED this?" (<---this works with junk food too)  "Will I throw it away in 6 months?"   The more and more I get rid of the less and less stress I have about cleaning the house, it is amazing!!!  FlyLady is not only getting rid of things.
The 15 minutes of work is wonderful!!!  It really works for everything!  Cleaning, relaxing, gardening, and working outdoors.  Last week I started pulling vines for 15 minute sections.  I am no where near finished, but I can already see a difference.  I didn't get overwhelmed or exausted from the heat.
The real first step for me was killing the inner perfectionist.  That little voice that says It has to be exactly how you want it now.  That voice takes over sometimes and makes you clean for 8 hours and then not again until another dire situation, because you have burnt yourself out.  Do the 15 minutes and STOP!!!  In about another 15 minutes you will be ready to go back if you need.  Remember things DON'T have to be perfect, just calm and clean.  If in 15 minutes there is still one spot let it be, don't obsess!
Alright just wanted to let you know what has been helping me out and getting me motivated.  Go lace up your shoes, do a 27 thing fling, 15 minute hot spot, shine your sink, take breaks, and get to bed on time (sleepy time tea helps me).  http://flylady.net/  Until next time.  Semper Paratus!